An NPC In The Witcher 3 Has Finally Realized How Weird Roach Is

An NPC In The Witcher 3 Has Finally Realized How Weird Roach Is

Roach is beloved in The Witcher 3 community for his strange shenanigans – however, after five years, an NPC has finally realized how weird he is.

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Roach is beloved among fans of The Witcher 3 for his strange shenanigans and aerial antics. Whether he’s gallivanting around the top of a large building or dangling his front legs off of the jagged overhang of a treacherous precipice, he’s mostly just having a laugh and actively rebelling against the code that is supposed to govern his actions.

From an external perspective, it’s pretty easy to laugh Roach’s weirdness off. It’s endearing, really, for your equine companion to consistently do things he is absolutely not supposed to do. But imagine for a second that you were actually in The Witcher 3 – a conscious rendering of code wandering the confines of its virtual realm. Now imagine you see a horse that is somehow inside a door – not on the inside of a door, but literally inside it.

Check out the post below, and you’ll see the most meta-theatrical instance of sheer horror in the history of The Witcher 3.

It’s the kind of thing you’d see when somebody has accidentally come into contact with the Eldritch truth. There are no words – just a futile, “Just… look.” What else are you supposed to do when you see a horse capable of permeating hard surfaces as if it was some sort of ethereal ghost?

One of the people in the comments hit the nail on the head in terms of describing Roach’s increasingly curious abilities. Until now, we’ve just thought of them as glitches, minor errors in the game’s makeup as it attempts to summon Roach from one place to another, or difficulties in rendering his AI in a way that makes sense.

But no, this Redditor has gone a step further. This Redditor has discovered the truth.

“I’m pretty sure Roach is the God of the Witcher universe,” writes the commenter. “Teleportation, phasing through matter, falling from high ground and still being completely unscratched makes him way too OP.”

There you have it. Roach is the divine deity, the original form of matter who presides over the entire universe. He probably instigated the Conjunction of the Spheres on purpose just so he could eventually become pals with someone like Geralt.

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